Monday, April 27, 2009

It's not easy being green!

  Funny how our perceptions change over time, isn’t it? The shock of the new becomes the yawn of the everyday, the cutting edge gets dulled into the commonplace.   

Take punk rock, for example.  What began in the 1970s as a rebellion against overblown “progressive” rock music soon devolved into lifestyle accessories.  The authentic ripped jeans, the safety pin piercings and the spiked hairstyles became today’s “distressed” jeans, 18-karat eyebrow rings and $100 (or more) stylist-created coifs. Yesterday’s rebels with a cause are today’s rebels without a clue.
   
  For would-be iconoclasts, that complicates life – how do you rebel when the symbols of your rebellion have become everyday occurrences?  Worse still, what do you do when the very sorts of people you’re trying to shock approve of your style?
   
  I couldn’t help wondering about that the other day when I encountered a young woman in the supermarket.  Encountered is probably too strong a word – we passed in the soup aisle, both lost in our own thoughts.   

  She was a teenager, shopping with her mother. She was dressed in a Goth/punk style that really wasn’t too extraordinary.  The most notable part of her appearance was her green hair.
   
  It was a lovely spring green, neither St. Patrick’s Day decoration bright nor Easter basket grass pastel.  It was, simply, an attractive shade of green.   A few years ago, I might have been shocked. As it was, I thought,  “Hmm, that green suits her. Looks nice.”
 
  Later, I considered her likely reaction to my opinion. She probably would have been appalled.   
  Think about it. In her eyes I’m an ancient geezer, old enough to be her father. I’m supposed to see the green hair and disapprove, my disapproval validating her rebellion, yes?
  
  Besides, even if I ever had been as young as she – a highly unlikely prospect -- I couldn’t possibly remember what it was like to be that age, to be not yet in control of your own life, to need to assert your individuality in whatever small way possible.
   
  And yet I do know that feeling, as does anyone who’s ever gone to high school, no matter when.  I also know it gets easier to be who you are once those alleged “best years of your life” are behind you. In that sense, the young woman’s rebel challenge still rings true.
   
 So here’s to green hair and what it represents.  And here’s to not being afraid to express yourself in whatever way suits you best.    

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Just Say No to No?

Had an interesting discussion with a family member over the weekend.  He's a  longtime veteran salesman, selling expensive high-tech equipment to medical facilities.

Somehow we got onto the matter of dealing with salesfolks.  He maintained a potential buyer should NEVER say no to a sales rep, because it's rude, politically incorrect and damaging to the rep's ego and sense of self.  

Instead, he wants the customer to say "maybe," then when the rep calls back at a later date, tell him/her that the budget doesn't allow the purchase, or that it doesn't fit the buyer's needs, or whatever.

Excuse me? When did a simple, straightforward, politely delivered "no" become rude?

Don't get me wrong.  I have the utmost respect for good salesmen and saleswomen.  It's a tough job, and one I know I'm too introverted to do well.

In my former career as a hospital housekeeping department manager, I dealt with all kinds of salespeople, selling everything from floor scrubbing machines to paper towels and soap.  Believe me, a good sales rep is an asset to a department manager, introducing new products to improve productivity, offering to train department members, and keeping up with the buyer's needs.

But if I can't afford what the rep's selling, or it doesn't suit my needs, or even if I just don't like the product, why should I prolong the dance of the transaction when I already know what my answer will be?  Why not just tell the rep no, respectfully, and move on?  It doesn't mean I'll never buy from him/her, just that a particular product isn't right at a particular time.  A waffling answer just wastes two people's time.

Even now, in my job search, I still prefer the direct approach.  I am in essence selling a product -- me -- to prospective employers.  If I'm a good fit for the job, by all means, tell me.  And if I'm not, tell me that too.  We save time, we part with respect, and we move on.

Sorry, but if your ego is damaged by hearing the word no instead of maybe, then you might be better off in another line of work.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Soaring Birds at Last!

FINALLY,  a team to root for in the NCAA championship game.  No, not Michigan State or North Carolina.

No, my loyalty is to the birds.  In this case, Louisville's Lady Cardinals, who will play Connecticut for the women's title.

Once again:

GO CARDINALS!

Friday, April 3, 2009

Espresso Thought!


(Espresso = small, concentrated, unfiltered cup of coffee.  Espresso Thought =  short, concentrated, unfiltered thought.) 

Who knew? Disco can save your life!

Researchers have found, no joke, that the beat of the Bee Gees' disco classic "Stayin' Alive" is the perfect rhythm for performing CPR.  The 103-beat-per-minute song is ideal for keeping blood pumping and oxygen moving to the brain until professional help arrives.

But if the Bee Gees aren't your cup of espresso, don't fret.  Queen's "Another One Bites The Dust" has the same beat.  Just be careful not to sing out loud while you're doing compressions ...

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Mysteries of Life!


It's always seemed to me that much of the world's innovation comes from people thinking "there must be a better way." See a need, then devise something to fill it.

Josephine Cochran, for example, got tired of servants breaking her china. So she invented the first automatic dishwasher.

Murray Spangler was looking for a way to sweep floors that wouldn't aggravate his allergies. So he combined a pillowcase, a box and an electric fan. He sold the design to Mr. Hoover and the rest is vacuum cleaner history.

Throughout history, inventors from Ford to Edison to Gates, Jobs and Wozniak have sought a better way to do things. If necessity is the mother of invention, then improvement is surely the father.

But there are some products on the market that don't seem to fit my tidy little theory.

Take the tea bag squeezer, for example. I didn't realize there was anything a small piece of plastic could do that a teaspoon against the side of a cup can't.

Or indoor wind chimes. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against wind chimes. I just never found it necessary to bring a small set inside and place it on my desk. Nor have I ever felt compelled to use "artificial wind" (as noted on the box), also known as a battery operated fan, to produce the soothing sound I can get for free outside my front door.

But my favorite solution to which there is no problem has to be the Grapple. (Pronounce it with a long A -- "Grape-L")

If my theory makes sense, it means someone, somewhere, looked at an apple, and thought "hmmm, what a lovely food product. Hand-held, portable, all natural, great tasting. But there's gotta be a better way."

So what did they do? The perfectly logical thing, of course. They infused it with natural and artificial flavor to make it taste like a grape! Mr. Spock would be so proud!

So would Dr. Spock, apparently. The company's marketing folks say the Grapple could improve children's eating habits and "introduce them to more produce." Such as what? The strawberry-flavored banana? The pineapple-flavored orange?

Hey, it could happen. After all, the apple doesn't fall far from the vine, right?